5 reasons why I started persianbrunette or oversharing my life on the internet

Sometimes we found ourselves so caught up in something that we tend to forget why we started it in the first place. The last years have been full of long and intense business readings and truth to be told: I think I’m not even able to tell you about 10% of them. However, there is a concept that kept coming back over and over again that has been stuck in my head ever since I saw it for the first time.

In order to bring any project to life: You need a strategy. Thinking about What your project is going to be? How are you going to bring it to life? But most importantly: Why are you bringing it to life? Okay, I swear the rest of the post will be less academic, let’s just not forget that I am currently writing a thesis and that the writing style just get stuck to my fingers. Even If I already talked about it in one of my videos, I thought it would be good to tell you my Why, the essence of persianbrunette as it might be completely misinterpreted. There are so many reasons nowadays people start being “public personalities”: Need of popularity, need of success, need to share their love for something specific, need to express themselves, money and so many more. In fact, all of them are perfectly acceptable and there is no need to classify anyone or any venture as evil or good.

People might think oh the girl just went nuts: Publishing pictures of herself on Social media and the internet, and honestly that is exactly the reaction I was afraid 9 months ago when I published my first picture on Instagram. I was afraid of so many things and the experience turned out to be more incredible than what I what I ever expected. People have been so nice to me, supporting me since the beginning, giving me strength when I was lacking from it. So here are my five reasons why, hope you enjoy babes.

1.This little guy and my friends have been my rock

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To say that I am lucky is an understatement, I am everyday grateful to be surrounded by such inspiring and amazing people. It started with Darius, my baby bro, that has been telling me for years that I needed to do something about my passion about fashion, my love of writing and my over bubbly personality. Darius and I were raised to love each other unconditionally, it surely was tough in the beginning as we almost killed each other everyday but some things happened in our lives during the last years that have made us inseparable. When I was having a rough time last December, he was determined in getting me out of this and told me that we would do this project together and that it would be amazing because I would be finally doing everything I always wanted to do. And that was it, he started taking pictures of me even when mad at me, even when he was in a rush, even if i was wearing the most horrifying outfit ever. He gave me idea of the content I could start creating and he is the one who had the idea of this post: you can tell he is my inspiration in everything I decide to do.

Then I started sharing on social media without telling anyone but my closest friends which have been a constant support in that adventure. Sometimes people of my school would fall on my Instagram page or I would meet people I know and they would tell me “Hey I can see you are really motivated with the whole Insta thing”. Yeah. I am. It became clear to me that people wouldn’t understand why I was doing this and I wasn’t ready to share the reasons why yet. It is not until two days ago that I allowed my social circles on Facebook to get to know about it because I didn’t want to be judged for a bunch of pictures I could post. So many times, being a fashion lover is being automatically tied to a superficial and brainless image, and that is a pure shame. Today, I know the most important people in my life fully supports me in whatever I decide to do and I couldn’t have been given a best gift. The rest doesn’t matter, I can be tied to any image you want to tag me to, the ones that truly matter know exactly who I am as a person and that is all care about.

2.I didn’t know who Neguine was anymore

11707586_10152966671241592_5363279404121607831_nIt is sad to say that I couldn’t find her anymore. During the last years it had all been what my parents wanted me to do, what my family expected me to do, what my school recommended me as a carrier path.

At some point, I was rolling with it: Doing a marketing Master and not taking any significant decision about where to take my life next. At 22, it was about time. It is only when I lost one of the most important person in my life that I realized how much everything was messed up. A few months ago I was on top of the world, always happy and confident that things would turned out right. When that happened: I felt lost and I felt like I would not be able reconnect with myself. Its a process, It is tough and I am still working on it.

I remembered that my goal was always fashion but realized there was some things I want more than that. But you truly can’t have it all and maybe it’s all just a question of timing or maybe not but in the moment, I had to focus on the things I could have rather on waiting for the things that wouldn’t be given to me right away.

3. I became to be terribly blasée and frustrated about my academic situation

10423942_10152183153686592_4091000526951463392_nI thought one more year in Business and Marketing would allow me to figure out what I wanted to do next. In my head it was like: “Okay, one more year is not that much. You are gonna learn a lot of stuff, meet a lot of people and have tons of fun”. That wasn’t it. Yes, I learnt a lot of stuff but I didn’t enjoy it like you are supposed to. I felt that the year was passing slowly, way slower than the past four years. Graduating in the Bachelor was the greatest satisfaction I had ever experimented in my entire life, I worked my ass off to stay in that school and finishing the degree was this personal challenge I had set to prove that I could do anything I wanted to. I felt so proud of myself and I don’t think such a feeling could ever be reproduced.

However in the masters, it seemed that I couldn’t feel satisfied and proud anymore. Maybe it’s the people, maybe it’s me, maybe it’s the school or maybe it had to do because I was once again stuck in someone else’s reality. Who knows. I don’t regret doing it, I have met wonderful people and it made me realize a lot of things like that the fun that people usually expect to have in that kind of experience isn’t the fun I was seeking for. Pretty much felt like an alien all the time: But hey, I’m sorry I love chilling in my sweats and eating ice-cream ( Oh my god, huge cliché alert) rather than partying all the time.

4. You gotta start somewhere, and then you will eventually connect the dots

previewMy intention was never to be famous or to have the life of one of those extremely popular bloggers that I have been following for years.

That’s not what I want as a life even though I truly respects the people that choose that as their reality, everyday I see Audrey working like nobody to provide the best content possible. but I needed to somehow connect with Fashion and start doing things related to it. No matter the number of followers I have, no matter how many people end up reading this: I want to stay the same person, evolve from it and be the best version of myself again.

Instagram melts my heart every time, I am astonished by how supportive you all are, I would never thought I would connect that way with people I never met! I am so glad I started on there, I pretty much don’t imagine my life without it now because I love the empowerment women have between each other. Without it I wouldn’t have met so many people virtually and in real life. I don’t know where it will lead me or how it is going to determine the person I will be in the future but I truly believe that the dots will get connected and that I am a Rolls-Royce in the making (haha, you have to know I am being sarcarstic here).

5. I had so much to say

IMG_9933After 5 years in business, I realized something: Just a very few people truly know me as I truly am. Genuinely connecting with people is so difficult when you are tied to a determined context. People tend to categorize you and attach opinions of you depending of how you are doing on this particular context. Was I one of the best students of my promotion? Absolutely not and truth is: I never cared about that.

I have been holding on so much, faked so many smiles, sold a personality that might not actually be coherent with the person I truly am. Part of me actually loves that because that means I actually chose the people I opened up to or that life put some people on my way for a reason. PersianBrunette.com might never be read or go anywhere but that’s the place I have chose to tell my truth and all those things I have been wanting to say for years. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

 

Lots of love always,

 

Neguine

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13 Comments

  1. Sandra E.
    September 6, 2015 / 5:44 pm

    That is awesome! Keep going!

  2. September 6, 2015 / 6:48 pm

    My sweet girl! We share so many similarities– I too told no one about this little venture, I am shocked and surprised and touched by the support and love we get from IG and I just wanted to write. You are amazing and you are doing this for all the right reasons. So happy to be a part of your journey Joonam ❤️

    • neguineb
      September 7, 2015 / 3:35 pm

      Michelle khanoom!! We definitely are really similar my babe and I am truly happy to get to know more about you everyday my love. As I told you so many times you inspire me so much, I perceive you as such a strong soul and powerful woman!! I love your writing, your blog, IG and most importantly my babe. I feel honored to share the journey with people like you my babe. Lots of love to you babe

  3. September 6, 2015 / 10:13 pm

    Congrats on your blog babe, it looks amazing! Since I’ve been following you on insta I was hoping you would get one! Beautifully written post, too. I feel the same way about sharing my blog sometimes and there are still some people I’m shy to tell I have one (also because I don’t want to be seen as shallow/superficial) but I’m constantly amazed at how supportive people are whether it’s in real life or online! Keep up the good work xo

    • neguineb
      September 7, 2015 / 3:32 pm

      Maria my beauty: Wow your comment truly made me smile, I can’t tell you how grateful I am to your words. Thank you a thousand times for all the love and support you always leave on my feed girl, You are truly amazing!!Babe, life is way too short to be stopped by anything or anyone from being the person you are. It is really something that I try to not forget at it is soooo easy to try to hide yourself. Sharing is difficult but it is what makes you different from everybody else and you should shine through your uniqueness babe. Thank you so much again and lots of love to you <3

  4. September 7, 2015 / 12:13 am

    My beautiful friend!! I enjoyed reading this and i love learning more about yourself . You are truly amazing and beautiful in so many ways babe. Thanks for sharing.
    Much love to you babe!
    Xox, Raysa

    • neguineb
      September 7, 2015 / 3:27 pm

      Raysa, My gorgeous babe… Thank you so much it means a lot to me that you guys get to read more about the whole backstage of what I show you everyday! You are so beautiful, caring and amazing as well my love. Inside out and I truly mean that!

      Sending you the biggest hug and lots of love as well

  5. September 7, 2015 / 6:18 am

    Firstly, congratulations girl!!! ahhhhh, its AMAZING!!! just like you! You are such a sweetheart and i just want to give you a big hug!!! seriously! You are so real and i love the way you write. ps: your bro is amazingly cute. lol I said that before. Dam too bad I am happily married. But we can all look. 😂😂

    Congrats my love and hope you are so proud. lots of love. Ash

    • neguineb
      September 7, 2015 / 3:26 pm

      HAHAHAHAHAHA! Ashley my babe. you are the absolute freaking best. Honestly! You are amazing, inspire me everyday with your style that I adore and your hilarious personality my babe!! I am sure that i would spend my time laughing with you my love and I am sending you such a big hug back!! Thank you for your words about my writing, It really moves me as it wasn’t easy to right this. And Gosh Ash, I know Baby bro is the cutest!! Trust me he adores you as well! He says your style and pictures are amazing and recognize you as one of the first person to fully support me. Thank you tons my babe. Love you to bits always!

  6. Jackie
    September 7, 2015 / 9:00 am

    My dear babe, I am so so proud of you. I can relate to this words a lot. So glad that you are stepping out of your comfort zone to do all this. I wish I do the same. I am thinking about having a blog for a long long time, and still I am like, mm I am not ready for it, or etc. But seeing you being brave, well, you inspire me girl. When I feel that right moment, probably I will make one, but till then I am so happy we can continue our friendship here. You go girl!!! So happy and so proud. Much love and kisses, Zana ❤

    • neguineb
      September 7, 2015 / 3:21 pm

      Jackie my love…. Thank you so much for everything, you know your support truly means the world to me. Doing this wasn’t easy at all, I am definitely breaking all my barriers here, just like you said. But hey, it is so worth it and I am sure that you’ll get the strength to do it in no time and when you do. I’ll be here to be proud of my girl! I am so grateful to you my love, you are incredibly beautiful and sweet inside out. I am so happy you like it and it makes me feel honored to know that you feel proud sweet babe <3 Lots of love to you always beauty <3

  7. September 8, 2015 / 3:46 pm

    How beautiful it is, to see you blossom like this 🙂

    <3

  8. September 10, 2015 / 2:30 pm

    Blogging can be a really great way of finding yourself and unleashing your creative juices. I started my blog for the same reason. Loved learning a little more about you!
    xo
    Siffat
    icingandglitter.wordpress.com

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